Showing up as hou are after years of masking and pretending must’ve taken bravery. But also is a testament to the lovely people you’ve chosen to have around you. Xx
Another great article. They always make me ponder in the best way. I had this same struggle when I had to give up my career as a Nurse. My body just couldn't cope with it, I knew it was the correct thing to do to take a step back, but my god did I feel guilty, like I was a terrible terrible person that I couldn't work. I felt like I was letting everyone down. I felt like I should be taken 'out back' like a race horse with a broken leg! Even though I would have been letting myself down if I continued to stress my body out by carrying on. And I wouldn't be much use to anyone anyway if I made my self so sick. I'm not sure where this belief came from that we're only worthy if we work or follow a traditional route. I guess capitalism, and 'societies' views. Like you said, a lot comes from fear, or keeping us fearful. We're easier to manipulate that way. It's very telling of a society by the way they treat their sick and elderly. It really does take so much deconditioning and courage to think in a new enlightened way!
Thank you so much Amanda. I am especially interested in your insight and reflections. More so after your latest post and gaining deeper insight of where you’re at and what’s coming up for you from a place of your own inner knowing. I am especially keen to hear from you on next weeks because the insight I have on that is there for someone that’s right where you are. I’d really love to know how that one lands, if it makes sense and if it’s enough material for you to work with. Mostly in respect of what you shared in your last post on where you’re at currently and what you feel you need to do next. I’m super hopeful that part 3 supports exactly that. But it will all depend on if it makes sense to you in the bare bones sense (I predict one of my future books will be fleshing out the details).
P.s. I am so bloody glad to hear that you did not wait to become completely disabled by illness to the point you physically could no get out of bed (like I did). Because it sounds like this is exactly where you were heading. It is my greatest hope that people don’t let it get that bad and take measures to pull it around in a slightly more proactive manner. I firmly believe that what I endured and the situation and circumstances I found myself in are avoidable and it needn’t be getting to the sure situation it is for so many of us. And yet it is - and it’s increasing.
I can't wait to read your next one. I really look forward to them. I'm so happy we have this platform to learn from one another. I really have no idea what I would have done without the support and knowledge from those that have been/going through such similar experiences! 💕
It’s really been great to hear that readers look forward to my posts🙏 the next one is scheduled for next Wednesday. I wish I could share one everyday atm, I have so much to say!
Wanted, also, to speak to this “It's very telling of a society by the way they treat their sick and elderly”. Because when we look at the blue zones (Netflix doc “live to 100”), they look after their elderly and no one is sick. So what is that teaching us?
P.s. if you haven’t watched it, highly recommend !!
Community and support is utterly essential. Critical. Non negotiable (in wellness anyway). What I’ve found in my research of migraine as a disease for example, is that community and support is often listed at the bottom. As if an after thought. It needs to be flip reversed. It needs to be at the top. (I’m also interested to know if those with full support around them heal faster. Recovery stories are abnormally too rare. But there seems to be a correlation).
I think we humans forget that we're social creatures sometimes. Even I do. I'm a huuuge introvert and love my own space but after a day or two of not seeing anyone I start to get super down, and wonder why. Like oh yeah I need to go speak with people. We also need face to face contact and literally skin/physical contact like hugs. We need those shared hormones. I think it tells our bodies that were around people and so were safe. Our bodies are evolved to be in groups for safety. Our bodies aren't evolved to be in this weird modern world with only screens. It's a really interesting topic.
I relate a lot with wisdom found here. I personally am afraid of doing life wrong, I keep seeing chronic illnesses as me doing something wrong (exercise, diet, sleep, etc) but the conflicting options and advice paralyse me. But then I realised this unhealthy obsession with health itself is what spurred my flare-ups and raised my stress level, worsening the problems. Learning to slow down is akin to a holy mission for me.
I love those words “a holy mission” and I feel and relate a lot to them.
Gosh, the conflict and how you describe that as paralysing - I hear you.
I shared some dietary tips recently and one of them was to not see it as another thing to get right. I have to say I’ve done everything very imperfectly.
Perfectly imperfect healing has become a bit of a motto. And I truly believe that we do not fully understand what health is, looks like, feels like. And that is leading to many misperceptions and making all that we’re living with all the more harder.
I’m glad you’ve realised the link between society’s unhealthy obsession with (what we believe) health to be and increased stressed and flare ups.
The question is, how do we focus on making changes to support our future health, without piling on the pressure and adding the stress?
Part 3 that is out this Wednesday may shed a little light on that (but I’ve no idea how it will yet land with readers so remains to be seen).
I'll patiently wait for the part 3. I love the perfectly imperfect healing there, as it relieves much of the burden to get everything done right. I think it's not just me, but also other friends and family members who think that the illnesses came to them because they've done something wrong with their life. The problem with that notion, although I can see the merit, is it's a slippery slope for those prone to the type-A personality to overcompensate thing. We with chronic illnesses and this kind of personality will then adopt this mindset of laser-focusing on many aspects of our lives to heal.
It's like a depleted powerbank (I'm sorry I'm tired after work my brain can't think a better metaphor). We've got very little power left to maintain normalcy but then we have to power through all the suggested lifestyle changes while being on the lookout for the next "tweak".
Yep 😅 I’m def type a too (and a lot of childhood trauma). I was incessantly beating myself up internally for not doing enough, not being good enough, always telling myself I should be doing more.
I can’t necessarily recommend the path I’ve chosen to others because I appreciate choosing it and doing the work it takes, then encountering all the trials and tribulations we do is any easier that not doing it. Because it isn’t. But I hope in sharing our stories, learning can happen, we can inspire and slowly we can start to learn there is another way and a lot needs to change to make that journey a supported one.
So much wisdom in this post Amanda! I had to break re-read it several times to take it all in. So so much learning to be had on this journey and I love your sea and boats analogies. I tell myself that I am stopping but really I am not so sure. Work has stopped for now, yes, but the rest of life feels so busy. I need to slow down more, but how? ! And oh my God yes the language of fear, that voice so loud right now xx
Ahhh thank you for being open to receiving and connecting with that wisdom! Let’s all own how extremely challenging it is to slow down. Without fear, shame, embarrassment. It’s one of the greatest challenges known to man in our present time! Yet one we are being called to make. And one I’ve personally found to be critical to our ability to our evolution as human beings.
Next week I am sharing my top ten ways to unleash the warrior within so like with amanda above, I am especially keen to see how these land with you. Whether it makes any sort of sense and is enough to get you started on how to approach it. It feels applicable to right where you’re at.
“I’ve done enough” love it 💚
Showing up as hou are after years of masking and pretending must’ve taken bravery. But also is a testament to the lovely people you’ve chosen to have around you. Xx
There’s a lot of alignment involved in it working out the way it did, that much I do know.
And that affirmation is a biggie. I’ve found it to be very powerful.
💚😘
Another great article. They always make me ponder in the best way. I had this same struggle when I had to give up my career as a Nurse. My body just couldn't cope with it, I knew it was the correct thing to do to take a step back, but my god did I feel guilty, like I was a terrible terrible person that I couldn't work. I felt like I was letting everyone down. I felt like I should be taken 'out back' like a race horse with a broken leg! Even though I would have been letting myself down if I continued to stress my body out by carrying on. And I wouldn't be much use to anyone anyway if I made my self so sick. I'm not sure where this belief came from that we're only worthy if we work or follow a traditional route. I guess capitalism, and 'societies' views. Like you said, a lot comes from fear, or keeping us fearful. We're easier to manipulate that way. It's very telling of a society by the way they treat their sick and elderly. It really does take so much deconditioning and courage to think in a new enlightened way!
Thank you so much Amanda. I am especially interested in your insight and reflections. More so after your latest post and gaining deeper insight of where you’re at and what’s coming up for you from a place of your own inner knowing. I am especially keen to hear from you on next weeks because the insight I have on that is there for someone that’s right where you are. I’d really love to know how that one lands, if it makes sense and if it’s enough material for you to work with. Mostly in respect of what you shared in your last post on where you’re at currently and what you feel you need to do next. I’m super hopeful that part 3 supports exactly that. But it will all depend on if it makes sense to you in the bare bones sense (I predict one of my future books will be fleshing out the details).
P.s. I am so bloody glad to hear that you did not wait to become completely disabled by illness to the point you physically could no get out of bed (like I did). Because it sounds like this is exactly where you were heading. It is my greatest hope that people don’t let it get that bad and take measures to pull it around in a slightly more proactive manner. I firmly believe that what I endured and the situation and circumstances I found myself in are avoidable and it needn’t be getting to the sure situation it is for so many of us. And yet it is - and it’s increasing.
I can't wait to read your next one. I really look forward to them. I'm so happy we have this platform to learn from one another. I really have no idea what I would have done without the support and knowledge from those that have been/going through such similar experiences! 💕
It’s really been great to hear that readers look forward to my posts🙏 the next one is scheduled for next Wednesday. I wish I could share one everyday atm, I have so much to say!
Wanted, also, to speak to this “It's very telling of a society by the way they treat their sick and elderly”. Because when we look at the blue zones (Netflix doc “live to 100”), they look after their elderly and no one is sick. So what is that teaching us?
P.s. if you haven’t watched it, highly recommend !!
Ooh yes I've watched that. They have such a great community feel there. I think that's what we're all missing and craving. A good observation!
Community and support is utterly essential. Critical. Non negotiable (in wellness anyway). What I’ve found in my research of migraine as a disease for example, is that community and support is often listed at the bottom. As if an after thought. It needs to be flip reversed. It needs to be at the top. (I’m also interested to know if those with full support around them heal faster. Recovery stories are abnormally too rare. But there seems to be a correlation).
I think we humans forget that we're social creatures sometimes. Even I do. I'm a huuuge introvert and love my own space but after a day or two of not seeing anyone I start to get super down, and wonder why. Like oh yeah I need to go speak with people. We also need face to face contact and literally skin/physical contact like hugs. We need those shared hormones. I think it tells our bodies that were around people and so were safe. Our bodies are evolved to be in groups for safety. Our bodies aren't evolved to be in this weird modern world with only screens. It's a really interesting topic.
Thank you so much for writing this post, Amber.
I relate a lot with wisdom found here. I personally am afraid of doing life wrong, I keep seeing chronic illnesses as me doing something wrong (exercise, diet, sleep, etc) but the conflicting options and advice paralyse me. But then I realised this unhealthy obsession with health itself is what spurred my flare-ups and raised my stress level, worsening the problems. Learning to slow down is akin to a holy mission for me.
I love those words “a holy mission” and I feel and relate a lot to them.
Gosh, the conflict and how you describe that as paralysing - I hear you.
I shared some dietary tips recently and one of them was to not see it as another thing to get right. I have to say I’ve done everything very imperfectly.
Perfectly imperfect healing has become a bit of a motto. And I truly believe that we do not fully understand what health is, looks like, feels like. And that is leading to many misperceptions and making all that we’re living with all the more harder.
I’m glad you’ve realised the link between society’s unhealthy obsession with (what we believe) health to be and increased stressed and flare ups.
The question is, how do we focus on making changes to support our future health, without piling on the pressure and adding the stress?
Part 3 that is out this Wednesday may shed a little light on that (but I’ve no idea how it will yet land with readers so remains to be seen).
I'll patiently wait for the part 3. I love the perfectly imperfect healing there, as it relieves much of the burden to get everything done right. I think it's not just me, but also other friends and family members who think that the illnesses came to them because they've done something wrong with their life. The problem with that notion, although I can see the merit, is it's a slippery slope for those prone to the type-A personality to overcompensate thing. We with chronic illnesses and this kind of personality will then adopt this mindset of laser-focusing on many aspects of our lives to heal.
It's like a depleted powerbank (I'm sorry I'm tired after work my brain can't think a better metaphor). We've got very little power left to maintain normalcy but then we have to power through all the suggested lifestyle changes while being on the lookout for the next "tweak".
Yep 😅 I’m def type a too (and a lot of childhood trauma). I was incessantly beating myself up internally for not doing enough, not being good enough, always telling myself I should be doing more.
I can’t necessarily recommend the path I’ve chosen to others because I appreciate choosing it and doing the work it takes, then encountering all the trials and tribulations we do is any easier that not doing it. Because it isn’t. But I hope in sharing our stories, learning can happen, we can inspire and slowly we can start to learn there is another way and a lot needs to change to make that journey a supported one.
So much wisdom in this post Amanda! I had to break re-read it several times to take it all in. So so much learning to be had on this journey and I love your sea and boats analogies. I tell myself that I am stopping but really I am not so sure. Work has stopped for now, yes, but the rest of life feels so busy. I need to slow down more, but how? ! And oh my God yes the language of fear, that voice so loud right now xx
Ahhh thank you for being open to receiving and connecting with that wisdom! Let’s all own how extremely challenging it is to slow down. Without fear, shame, embarrassment. It’s one of the greatest challenges known to man in our present time! Yet one we are being called to make. And one I’ve personally found to be critical to our ability to our evolution as human beings.
Next week I am sharing my top ten ways to unleash the warrior within so like with amanda above, I am especially keen to see how these land with you. Whether it makes any sort of sense and is enough to get you started on how to approach it. It feels applicable to right where you’re at.