One of the reasons I have been offline (from here) since April is that I have been renovating my home, a liitle at a time, almost every day. It's not quite the way I want it yet, and there are some arrangements to be negotiated with my husband, but it feels *so* much better than it did even at the stsrt of this year!
This week I am taking a deep dive into what used to be my mom's room. It will be three years next month since she had to go into a skilled nursing facility, and I left her room all but untouched until recently. As I've tended to the rest of the home, the shifts have been made and now I am finally ready to enter her room with curiosity to see what I can change it into. I'm folding this into the tending of my Foundation, which has been this year's big project.
Wow, that is huge with your mums room. (On top of the entire house too) Glad to hear you have given it some time and space and waited until you have built yourself up to feel ready.
Can you feel the energy shift? It’s been almost immediate here. Though I’d say that’s left me somewhat discombobulated and I need to take it slow this week to re-centre x
100% believe there's a connection between holding on to clutter correlating with holding on to past emotions ❤️ I always say a good clear out is good for the soul! ⭐ Big hug for how well you've done releasing your past and welcoming your new, improved future - onwards and upwards!! X
Isn’t there just? I was conscious that insinuating there’s a connection when so many are dealing with the complexities of chronic and invisible ill health would come across as too simplified and surface level. But now I’ve written this I can see there’s so much depth to it.
I am super excited for the new and improved figure! Can’t wait to see where this big clear out leads 🤩
I go through phases of needing to just get rid of the junk in my house. That is always a sign that I am overwhelmed mentally and physically. Decluttering is just the excuse. I do love removing excess. ❤️
Thank you for this essay, Amber. Its absolutely a thing that whatever you hadn’t quite dealt with in your life before chronic illness will follow you to be an even bigger PITA when you can barely deal with getting yourself fed. I sometimes fantasize about having another apartment I can get all my things moved to, and I can just move back what I absolutely want and need. It takes so long while I’m living amongst it. And the reminders keep the emotional temperature hot. Like our more troubling dreams, our clutter is sometimes significant and sometimes just the detritus of life that we’re processing in our own sweet (or sour!) time.
You’re welcome 😘 so glad this one really landed, it took me a lot to write and it’s 4 years since I moved from my home in the city. I’m so bloody grateful and chuffed to bits I moved into a tiny home - it did not escape me that getting rid of all my stuff was part of the journey but this last bit, woah! (I say last bit, there are still the wardrobes to go and a little bit left in the tiny bedroom).
I even brought food here that was out of date before I moved it so getting a new place and not bringing it all with me (I gave myself 6 months overlap to try achieve this) did not work for me😆 I just had to give it the time it needed and do what I could when I could. Oh, and call in help! Like with all aspects of this journey, I’ve found no other way🙃
What a journey you've been on Amber! So pleased for you that you have found your way to a happier way of living! I've mostly found my way there too, but the decluttering definitely needs more work, I am slowly getting there but I do get stuck and don't know how to ask for help without the help also taking more energy than I have available. It also doesn't help that a lot of the clutter isn't mine! (Though some is) I'm learning to accept that I'm working on a different timescale and that's ok!
I do agree that decluttering can be part of the emotional work we have to do, and I can feel how much easier I breathe in a less cluttered environment! Other than books, paints and painting which don't count as clutter, obviously! Xx
I’ll need to write about that. (Took me years and the breakdown was the catalyst but still 8 years to get me from there to where I have just arrived now)
It’s been one of the greatest lessons I’ve had to learn on this journey. I used to think it came through childhood experiences but when I look at my niece she wouldn’t accept help from the off. After years of encouraging, she’ll now ask for it. But to me, I’m sure she came through with that lesson to learn and I’m so glad to have helped teach her it in her early years🙏✨
Nodding all the way through this. I cannot put on Vinted all the going out gothy clothes or start business attire I am unlikely to wear again. Seems ridiculous as could make me some cash that is needed, but also a part of me I do not want to let go of yet. There is hope I will somehow return to that time, but I don’t think I ever will or want to in the same way. So glad you have a partner assuring you with the clear outs now. Hope it keeps on helping you let go and inspires me to do the same.
I have tried to put clothes on vinted. Someone wanted them and I took them off! I still have those same dresses in my wardrobe, unworn.
I do not know how I have wound up with 3 double wardrobes in a tiny static caravan but there you go! (They are next to get the sort out).
Who can you ask to help put those items on and get them sold for you? (Assuming this is something you want and helps align with your needs and goals).
In the end, I asked a friend (after never asking a friend for help in any way before) and she put a camera, a spray tanning kit and whatever else on marketplace for me. Got the buyers, I just arranged drop off and cash collection.
I also did a few car boot sales with the same friend and asked her to be there at the start of the first one just to help me. I sold a painting for £100 that day.
There is simply NO WAY I could’ve done this on my own. And I no longer feel any shame or embarrassment that this is true for me.
Thanks for your rigorous honesty. You are in good company, I have been on my healing journey for 20+ years. It’s normal to wonder “who will I be without my illness/disability?” Now you get to choose and create a new life for yourself. In recent years I’ve come to create my own meditations based on my personal belief system. One key phrase is “Healing and honoring myself first is the highest way to honor all.” We cannot be of service to anyone unless we first serve ourselves. It is not selfish, it is self-love and caring, but most important is self-forgiveness. One master said, “love your neighbor as yourself” and largely people get it backwards. You cannot give to anyone what you do not have, so first love yourself, then you are well prepared to love others.
So on board with all you say here and I’ve come to learn all this the very hard way! However, Still, and nonetheless, I have learned. And for that I am grateful. And wouldn’t change a thing.🙏🪽
Indeed, after almost 3 years of disability, I came into my healing with immense gratitude for every day of it. There were so many valuable lessons I could not have learned any other way. My greatest blessings seem to be born from my greatest challenges.
It is like night and day. Though I still have symptoms that pale in comparison, now I have skills, tools, and practitioners to help. I know my mind-body system better than ever and take responsibility for what I create. I am writing my healing journey memoir titled Tenacity Has Wings and in the meantime I occasionally post on my Substack newsletters.
Oh I cannot wait for your memoir! My fave genre and there has only been one story on recovery I’ve found so far - unless you know of any?
Interesting that you say practitioners ….. I haven’t found anyone in recovery who doesn’t have a community around them.
I’m the same with the responsibility for what I create. It was a dark day back in my flat over 6 years ago when I sat with the prospect that “if I’ve created this situation I am in (such discomfort) then I can create my way out of it” (such empowerment).
Thank you for writing this, Amber. I'm glad that you feel better and the symptoms are manageable. Big clap on the decluttering. I'm thankful I never really had a chance to accumulate stuff not by choice, because I often moved places. But even with less than 5 years of stay in a place there were things I took days to declutter, and I can vouch for the knots in my heart to start getting undone.
One of the great lessons of living and managing symptoms for me is to not be ashamed nor afraid to ask for help, and to gladly receive any offered help. I used to see myself less than if I can't sort something out by myself. I prided myself on being a good problem-solver at work, and that bleeds into my personal life. It's sad, tbh, now that I look back on it. Now I have deeper friendships and I enjoy offering my help as well because who knows the other person is also afraid of asking.
It’s huge isn’t it, asking for and accepting help. A big part of the journey. When I retracted declining the offer for help with packing my flat, my friend was genuinely ecstatic that I took her up on the offer. She was so happy to help and even brought someone else with her! It never occurred to me that others would love to help me as much as I do them🙃
Thank you for the reminder that asking for help is brave and wise. I agree that it deepens relationships and there is no shame in it. I was raised in a family that kept their emotions quiet and never reached out for help. It was better to be quiet and silent. What a bunch of 💩. I ensure that my young adult kids know they can come to me... no matter what. I will listen and find the help that they need if necessary. I don't want them to suffer.
I have been decluttering as we get ready to move house. I love it but my husband is a hoarder and a 'let's keep it just in case'. That said I find sometimes if I do it when I am feeling unwell that's when I make mistakes. We're not materialistic generally but last week I gave away two gorgeous bags because I hadn't used them for many years. The woman in the charity shop asked me if I was sure. Later the same day I realised what I could have used them for and deeply regretted it. I couldn't stop thinking about it for days. 😏
I too have had this experience with a bag I gave away in the early stages of my decluttering (4 years ago). That, I find is a big practice in itself. Super challenging. But all this stuff we’re hoarding just in case, it’s never coming for most of it and it’s taking up so much space. I’ve found in the journey of it all, it’s opened up more space for me and that is going to win every time now over regret (it still punches me when I think about the one thing I gave away😆 but I’m far happier on all that I’ve given away that’s gone to a good home - including that one bag).
Yes I will get over it. There are only two things I really regret and for very sentimental reasons because the aunties who gave me them are now dead and they were reminders to me of how much I was loved by them. But as I am writing this I am realising I can remember how much they loved me whenever I want. I don't need a 'thing' to remind me of that. 😊 Interesting, something inside me just relaxed... 💜
Ahhhh that’s wonderful, I’m so delighted to hear that Karen🥰
I lost a lot of sentimental stuff in a bad break up that was spectacularly bad because of my own actions. It really helped years later when my Nana shared one of her life’s greatest insights “you don’t need things to remind you of people”.
I always remember that now when I miss that perfect photo opportunity or wish I hadn’t got rid of that thing. Memories are for keeps, always in our hearts💞
My hubby is a hoarder too and needs to hold on to old nuts, screws, and hardware "just in case". It drives me nuts as I am the one to deal with all in the basement. There are times when I secretly remove things to donate.
What a cracking piece of writing ✍️ I love what came up from the declutterring.
I love systematically going to a corner of the house and just having a good sort out. I really enjoyed eating our way through the cupboards, fridge and freezer before travelling this summer. Coming home to the empty shelves was so enjoyable.
I spent the summer trying to persuade my sister to let me help her clear some of her stuff out, but she didn’t take me up on the offer. I’d love to get my hands on some of the corners on her house and have a good old get rid session!
There is so much emotion in stuff, and emotions have a big impact on health ❤️🩹
It’s interesting how we won’t accept help, even when offered. It was something I couldn’t do before I realised people actually want and love to help others (in much the same way I always have).
It’s been huge all that this has brought up for me and the reflections that only came through when in writing about it. I knew there was a link to the physical clutter and my ill health but i didn’t know it went so far back and there was so much going on emotionally.
Isn't it amazing what comes up during decluttering? My parents are dealing with this in an attempt to downsize their home. My dad can't part with anything, even his shot glasses and silly beer signs that hang in the garage.
My partner had to sort out my kitchen - he opened up 50% more space in doing it as I was sorting out the en-suite toilet junk. I had a cupboard full of wine, champagne and cocktail glasses. I stopped drinking 6 years ago! No one really visits me that drinks now.
Haha no way! That’s so funny!!! I didn’t know you had a booze cupboard in your place. We accumulate alcohol when people visit and bring something, gifts (usually for Miguel as a teacher) or left over from parties or people bringing some with them. We turn opened wine into cooking wine. We keep a couple of bits for guests and the rest gets shipped off to family members! Miguel’s good at moving stuff on.
Oh wow, sounds like a big task for your parents. I wrote a bit about stuff and accumulation of it in relation to my infertility journey.
It’s so interesting what people hold on to! And sadly, one day we won’t be here, then someone else has to sort through those things.
Perhaps could be a nice point of connection with your dad? Ask him why he likes these shot glasses and signs so much. There are probably lots of stories to tell!
I was thinking of that. I am going to ask him how he could share the memories of an item with us kids. Maybe write or record something and take a picture. I know that he would love to share his memories, so maybe link the two. Thanks for the input.
This is such a gorgeous idea. Im in the process of sharing my grandparents story - hopefully into an ebook. And it began by asking them so many random questions about their life and I found out sooooo much I didn’t know! To complete the journey I went bank for round 2 (grandad no longer here) and my aunts was there (nans daughter) and she found out soooo much she hadn’t known either. And in my nanas 93 years and infliction that old age and health is having on her, it brought much joy to her and an appreciation of what she has. It’s a truly special experience for all.
That would be a wonderful thing to listen or read. I like the idea of recording it, and if he permits, perhaps could even make a nice piece for here? I know I’d be interested in reading it. What people grow attached to and choose to keep is such an interesting topic!
Thank you for sharing your journey with such courage and honesty. Several close friends and acquaintances have dealt with mental and physical challenges. A sweet, young woman recently took her life and it shook me up. Another friend lost her 15-year-old daughter to suicide. Mental and physical illness should not be taboo to discuss. As a society, we should listen and support one another more. In the US, the health coverage is horrible psychiatric care and usually comes out of our pockets. People are not receiving the care that they deserve and desperately need. What a shame. I am grateful that more people are sharing their stories and demystifying illness. I am glad that you are feeling better and continue to lean on the support of your practices and others. ❤️
Gosh I am sorry to hear that. This journey has taught me that we do not understand what true health is. What it looks like, what it feels like. What our needs are. That we have them. And that it’s time to make them a priority.
There was an enormous amount of privilege in me getting from where I once was to where I am now. And I am taking that privilege to share my story so that we can begin to understand.
One of the reasons I have been offline (from here) since April is that I have been renovating my home, a liitle at a time, almost every day. It's not quite the way I want it yet, and there are some arrangements to be negotiated with my husband, but it feels *so* much better than it did even at the stsrt of this year!
This week I am taking a deep dive into what used to be my mom's room. It will be three years next month since she had to go into a skilled nursing facility, and I left her room all but untouched until recently. As I've tended to the rest of the home, the shifts have been made and now I am finally ready to enter her room with curiosity to see what I can change it into. I'm folding this into the tending of my Foundation, which has been this year's big project.
Wow, that is huge with your mums room. (On top of the entire house too) Glad to hear you have given it some time and space and waited until you have built yourself up to feel ready.
Can you feel the energy shift? It’s been almost immediate here. Though I’d say that’s left me somewhat discombobulated and I need to take it slow this week to re-centre x
Now that I've been at it for a few months, yes. Here's to taking it slow as well.
100% believe there's a connection between holding on to clutter correlating with holding on to past emotions ❤️ I always say a good clear out is good for the soul! ⭐ Big hug for how well you've done releasing your past and welcoming your new, improved future - onwards and upwards!! X
Isn’t there just? I was conscious that insinuating there’s a connection when so many are dealing with the complexities of chronic and invisible ill health would come across as too simplified and surface level. But now I’ve written this I can see there’s so much depth to it.
I am super excited for the new and improved figure! Can’t wait to see where this big clear out leads 🤩
I go through phases of needing to just get rid of the junk in my house. That is always a sign that I am overwhelmed mentally and physically. Decluttering is just the excuse. I do love removing excess. ❤️
I hope I can keep on top of mine and learn from this so it doesn’t get as bad in the future 💙
Thank you for this essay, Amber. Its absolutely a thing that whatever you hadn’t quite dealt with in your life before chronic illness will follow you to be an even bigger PITA when you can barely deal with getting yourself fed. I sometimes fantasize about having another apartment I can get all my things moved to, and I can just move back what I absolutely want and need. It takes so long while I’m living amongst it. And the reminders keep the emotional temperature hot. Like our more troubling dreams, our clutter is sometimes significant and sometimes just the detritus of life that we’re processing in our own sweet (or sour!) time.
You’re welcome 😘 so glad this one really landed, it took me a lot to write and it’s 4 years since I moved from my home in the city. I’m so bloody grateful and chuffed to bits I moved into a tiny home - it did not escape me that getting rid of all my stuff was part of the journey but this last bit, woah! (I say last bit, there are still the wardrobes to go and a little bit left in the tiny bedroom).
I even brought food here that was out of date before I moved it so getting a new place and not bringing it all with me (I gave myself 6 months overlap to try achieve this) did not work for me😆 I just had to give it the time it needed and do what I could when I could. Oh, and call in help! Like with all aspects of this journey, I’ve found no other way🙃
What a journey you've been on Amber! So pleased for you that you have found your way to a happier way of living! I've mostly found my way there too, but the decluttering definitely needs more work, I am slowly getting there but I do get stuck and don't know how to ask for help without the help also taking more energy than I have available. It also doesn't help that a lot of the clutter isn't mine! (Though some is) I'm learning to accept that I'm working on a different timescale and that's ok!
I do agree that decluttering can be part of the emotional work we have to do, and I can feel how much easier I breathe in a less cluttered environment! Other than books, paints and painting which don't count as clutter, obviously! Xx
Even more tricky to negotiate when the clutter of others is involved!
Slowly but surely is the key (I left my home on the city 4 years ago).
Same with the books and all my writing pads - I’m a creative don’t you know😉
Yes you are! ❤️
“I don't know how to ask for help without the help also taking more energy than I have available.” Oh yes, that is a whole other layer.
💯how do we ask for it?
I’ll need to write about that. (Took me years and the breakdown was the catalyst but still 8 years to get me from there to where I have just arrived now)
That's definitely what stops me at the moment!
If only we lived in the same city, we could tag team one another!
That would be great!!
Keep going and keep growing Amber! Love, Linda xx
Thank you gorgeous soul🙏❤️🔥
Knowing you need help is a big step and then going about asking for it is a big big thing and you did it.
Sharing your story in the way that you have is so very powerful and important and I thank you x
It’s been one of the greatest lessons I’ve had to learn on this journey. I used to think it came through childhood experiences but when I look at my niece she wouldn’t accept help from the off. After years of encouraging, she’ll now ask for it. But to me, I’m sure she came through with that lesson to learn and I’m so glad to have helped teach her it in her early years🙏✨
Nodding all the way through this. I cannot put on Vinted all the going out gothy clothes or start business attire I am unlikely to wear again. Seems ridiculous as could make me some cash that is needed, but also a part of me I do not want to let go of yet. There is hope I will somehow return to that time, but I don’t think I ever will or want to in the same way. So glad you have a partner assuring you with the clear outs now. Hope it keeps on helping you let go and inspires me to do the same.
Oh I can so relate to that! I fully hear you.
I have tried to put clothes on vinted. Someone wanted them and I took them off! I still have those same dresses in my wardrobe, unworn.
I do not know how I have wound up with 3 double wardrobes in a tiny static caravan but there you go! (They are next to get the sort out).
Who can you ask to help put those items on and get them sold for you? (Assuming this is something you want and helps align with your needs and goals).
In the end, I asked a friend (after never asking a friend for help in any way before) and she put a camera, a spray tanning kit and whatever else on marketplace for me. Got the buyers, I just arranged drop off and cash collection.
I also did a few car boot sales with the same friend and asked her to be there at the start of the first one just to help me. I sold a painting for £100 that day.
There is simply NO WAY I could’ve done this on my own. And I no longer feel any shame or embarrassment that this is true for me.
Thanks for your rigorous honesty. You are in good company, I have been on my healing journey for 20+ years. It’s normal to wonder “who will I be without my illness/disability?” Now you get to choose and create a new life for yourself. In recent years I’ve come to create my own meditations based on my personal belief system. One key phrase is “Healing and honoring myself first is the highest way to honor all.” We cannot be of service to anyone unless we first serve ourselves. It is not selfish, it is self-love and caring, but most important is self-forgiveness. One master said, “love your neighbor as yourself” and largely people get it backwards. You cannot give to anyone what you do not have, so first love yourself, then you are well prepared to love others.
So on board with all you say here and I’ve come to learn all this the very hard way! However, Still, and nonetheless, I have learned. And for that I am grateful. And wouldn’t change a thing.🙏🪽
Indeed, after almost 3 years of disability, I came into my healing with immense gratitude for every day of it. There were so many valuable lessons I could not have learned any other way. My greatest blessings seem to be born from my greatest challenges.
I’m intrigued to know….how is your health in the present day?
It is like night and day. Though I still have symptoms that pale in comparison, now I have skills, tools, and practitioners to help. I know my mind-body system better than ever and take responsibility for what I create. I am writing my healing journey memoir titled Tenacity Has Wings and in the meantime I occasionally post on my Substack newsletters.
Oh I cannot wait for your memoir! My fave genre and there has only been one story on recovery I’ve found so far - unless you know of any?
Interesting that you say practitioners ….. I haven’t found anyone in recovery who doesn’t have a community around them.
I’m the same with the responsibility for what I create. It was a dark day back in my flat over 6 years ago when I sat with the prospect that “if I’ve created this situation I am in (such discomfort) then I can create my way out of it” (such empowerment).
Thank you for writing this, Amber. I'm glad that you feel better and the symptoms are manageable. Big clap on the decluttering. I'm thankful I never really had a chance to accumulate stuff not by choice, because I often moved places. But even with less than 5 years of stay in a place there were things I took days to declutter, and I can vouch for the knots in my heart to start getting undone.
One of the great lessons of living and managing symptoms for me is to not be ashamed nor afraid to ask for help, and to gladly receive any offered help. I used to see myself less than if I can't sort something out by myself. I prided myself on being a good problem-solver at work, and that bleeds into my personal life. It's sad, tbh, now that I look back on it. Now I have deeper friendships and I enjoy offering my help as well because who knows the other person is also afraid of asking.
It’s huge isn’t it, asking for and accepting help. A big part of the journey. When I retracted declining the offer for help with packing my flat, my friend was genuinely ecstatic that I took her up on the offer. She was so happy to help and even brought someone else with her! It never occurred to me that others would love to help me as much as I do them🙃
Thank you for the reminder that asking for help is brave and wise. I agree that it deepens relationships and there is no shame in it. I was raised in a family that kept their emotions quiet and never reached out for help. It was better to be quiet and silent. What a bunch of 💩. I ensure that my young adult kids know they can come to me... no matter what. I will listen and find the help that they need if necessary. I don't want them to suffer.
I have been decluttering as we get ready to move house. I love it but my husband is a hoarder and a 'let's keep it just in case'. That said I find sometimes if I do it when I am feeling unwell that's when I make mistakes. We're not materialistic generally but last week I gave away two gorgeous bags because I hadn't used them for many years. The woman in the charity shop asked me if I was sure. Later the same day I realised what I could have used them for and deeply regretted it. I couldn't stop thinking about it for days. 😏
I too have had this experience with a bag I gave away in the early stages of my decluttering (4 years ago). That, I find is a big practice in itself. Super challenging. But all this stuff we’re hoarding just in case, it’s never coming for most of it and it’s taking up so much space. I’ve found in the journey of it all, it’s opened up more space for me and that is going to win every time now over regret (it still punches me when I think about the one thing I gave away😆 but I’m far happier on all that I’ve given away that’s gone to a good home - including that one bag).
Yes I will get over it. There are only two things I really regret and for very sentimental reasons because the aunties who gave me them are now dead and they were reminders to me of how much I was loved by them. But as I am writing this I am realising I can remember how much they loved me whenever I want. I don't need a 'thing' to remind me of that. 😊 Interesting, something inside me just relaxed... 💜
Ahhhh that’s wonderful, I’m so delighted to hear that Karen🥰
I lost a lot of sentimental stuff in a bad break up that was spectacularly bad because of my own actions. It really helped years later when my Nana shared one of her life’s greatest insights “you don’t need things to remind you of people”.
I always remember that now when I miss that perfect photo opportunity or wish I hadn’t got rid of that thing. Memories are for keeps, always in our hearts💞
I agree that we shouldn’t force ourselves to declutter when unwell. That sounds like a painful - and potent - reminder.
My hubby is a hoarder too and needs to hold on to old nuts, screws, and hardware "just in case". It drives me nuts as I am the one to deal with all in the basement. There are times when I secretly remove things to donate.
Yes I do that too 😅
What a cracking piece of writing ✍️ I love what came up from the declutterring.
I love systematically going to a corner of the house and just having a good sort out. I really enjoyed eating our way through the cupboards, fridge and freezer before travelling this summer. Coming home to the empty shelves was so enjoyable.
I spent the summer trying to persuade my sister to let me help her clear some of her stuff out, but she didn’t take me up on the offer. I’d love to get my hands on some of the corners on her house and have a good old get rid session!
There is so much emotion in stuff, and emotions have a big impact on health ❤️🩹
It’s interesting how we won’t accept help, even when offered. It was something I couldn’t do before I realised people actually want and love to help others (in much the same way I always have).
It’s been huge all that this has brought up for me and the reflections that only came through when in writing about it. I knew there was a link to the physical clutter and my ill health but i didn’t know it went so far back and there was so much going on emotionally.
Isn't it amazing what comes up during decluttering? My parents are dealing with this in an attempt to downsize their home. My dad can't part with anything, even his shot glasses and silly beer signs that hang in the garage.
My partner had to sort out my kitchen - he opened up 50% more space in doing it as I was sorting out the en-suite toilet junk. I had a cupboard full of wine, champagne and cocktail glasses. I stopped drinking 6 years ago! No one really visits me that drinks now.
Haha no way! That’s so funny!!! I didn’t know you had a booze cupboard in your place. We accumulate alcohol when people visit and bring something, gifts (usually for Miguel as a teacher) or left over from parties or people bringing some with them. We turn opened wine into cooking wine. We keep a couple of bits for guests and the rest gets shipped off to family members! Miguel’s good at moving stuff on.
Oh wow, sounds like a big task for your parents. I wrote a bit about stuff and accumulation of it in relation to my infertility journey.
It’s so interesting what people hold on to! And sadly, one day we won’t be here, then someone else has to sort through those things.
Perhaps could be a nice point of connection with your dad? Ask him why he likes these shot glasses and signs so much. There are probably lots of stories to tell!
I was thinking of that. I am going to ask him how he could share the memories of an item with us kids. Maybe write or record something and take a picture. I know that he would love to share his memories, so maybe link the two. Thanks for the input.
This is such a gorgeous idea. Im in the process of sharing my grandparents story - hopefully into an ebook. And it began by asking them so many random questions about their life and I found out sooooo much I didn’t know! To complete the journey I went bank for round 2 (grandad no longer here) and my aunts was there (nans daughter) and she found out soooo much she hadn’t known either. And in my nanas 93 years and infliction that old age and health is having on her, it brought much joy to her and an appreciation of what she has. It’s a truly special experience for all.
What a wonderful resource. The wheels are turning in my brain. 😊
Yey 😍
That would be a wonderful thing to listen or read. I like the idea of recording it, and if he permits, perhaps could even make a nice piece for here? I know I’d be interested in reading it. What people grow attached to and choose to keep is such an interesting topic!
Thank you for sharing your journey with such courage and honesty. Several close friends and acquaintances have dealt with mental and physical challenges. A sweet, young woman recently took her life and it shook me up. Another friend lost her 15-year-old daughter to suicide. Mental and physical illness should not be taboo to discuss. As a society, we should listen and support one another more. In the US, the health coverage is horrible psychiatric care and usually comes out of our pockets. People are not receiving the care that they deserve and desperately need. What a shame. I am grateful that more people are sharing their stories and demystifying illness. I am glad that you are feeling better and continue to lean on the support of your practices and others. ❤️
Gosh I am sorry to hear that. This journey has taught me that we do not understand what true health is. What it looks like, what it feels like. What our needs are. That we have them. And that it’s time to make them a priority.
There was an enormous amount of privilege in me getting from where I once was to where I am now. And I am taking that privilege to share my story so that we can begin to understand.
Yes! There’s a joy in being able to help, as much as being helped can bring joy.
I think sometimes help can be well meaning but not the type of help the person needs, or even that it’s not the right time yet.
I love where it took you. I love where the writing lead you. And that was just from a bunch a stuff in a bog!
😆😂🤣🤗🤩🪽❤️🔥